Masood “Tommy”: A Forgotten Cult Figure

AMU, being a residential university, has a set of rules and etiquette for daily life, also referred to as “traditions of AMU“. These rules have been there ever since AMU came into existence. No single person can claim its ownership. It must have grown over the years, a new rule must have been added as and when our very old students of AMU felt its need. The primary need for such traditions was discipline, of course. Apart from practicing discipline, there has been an overpowering urge among AMU students “to stand out from the crowds, masses and hordes of people”. To have a distinct identity, one needs to have a distinct and unique style. This thought must have become the guiding force for writing down these unwritten rules of and by AMU students. The best thing is that most of the AMU Alumni try and maintain these traditions all their lives. That is what gives them pleasure and pride.

Going with the AMU traditions, there has always been a good room for humor. Till mid eighties, humorous activities were very much appreciated and held in good taste. But, slowly they seem to be losing their place. Almost, every student of AMU must have heard about some humorous incidents from their seniors or the alumni of AMU. For every period of time, AMU has seen some heroes who mastered the art of rib-tickling humor.

Well, one of such heroes of AMU happens to be “Masood Tommy“. I believe “Tommy” must have been the nickname given to him by his contemporaries. I heard a lot of stories about him. He had a very ingenious sense of humor. He was a master of wit & repartee. Once his Urdu teacher rebuked him for not writing Urdu properly as the nukhtas (the dots used in Urdu alphabets) were not used properly. He took his notebook to correct his mistakes and came back in sometime. Looking at his notebook this time around, the teacher went berserk and asked him, “Why did you put so many dots in the top margin?”. He retorted softly, “Nukhtay hain. jahan jitni zarurat ho daal lijiye” (They are dots, use them as and where you want).

Another incident from his life is about the time when the British Viceroy of India was scheduled to pay a visit to Aligarh Muslim University. Tired of Masood Tommy’s tricks, the Vice Chancellor (VC) of AMU decided to send him off to his native place. When asked to do so, Masood Tommy expressed his paucity of funds. So, he was given train fare to his town. After getting the fare, an idea struck his mind. Instead of going to his native place, he started off for Delhi. He went to Rashtrapati Bhawan and told that he was a students’ representative sent by AMU VC, to accompany the Honorable Viceroy of India on his visit to AMU. The Viceroy was impressed with this. All through the journey, Masood Tommy tried his best to impress him further more.

When they arrived at Aligarh, AMU VC and other officials were surprised to see Masood Tommy alongside the Viceroy. Masood Tommy introduced the AMU staff to the Viceroy and it was a shocking and embarrassing situation for them. To avoid further damage to the honor and reputation of AMU, they wanted to get rid of Masood Tommy, as soon as possible. Masood Tommy himself walked away innocently. After a while, when asked about his journey, the Viceroy remarked, “Oh! The Gentleman you had sent to accompany me gave me a very pleasant company. He kept me busy talking about his Alma Mater, its staff and students. I would want him to be with me during my stay. By the way, where has he disappeared?” Hearing all this, every body lost their nerves and search for Masood Tommy began. He was found but only after a lot of persuasion, coaxing and cajoling, he relented to join the Viceroy of India on his Aligarh tour.

Such were his charming manners that even though, he wasn’t a very good student yet he was successful in impressing the Viceroy of India and creating a good reputation for his alma mater. The Aligarians of his times must have thought that Masood Tommy will always be remembered for his witty remarks and tricks but here he is, about to vanished in the deep dark valley of oblivion. This write-up is just a humble tribute to the quintessential humorist and the spirit of Aligarian Humor.

~ Qais